What If I Told You…

Think back to when you were a little kid. Do you remember making a wish and blowing out dandelions? The magic was only just getting started when our breath dislodged the seeds from the flower.

Attached to dandelion seeds are those white whispy things called pappus. The pappus is actually a porous parachute of sorts that helps the seed land on the ground more smoothly. The whisps of the pappus create a self-protective vortex around the seed itself as it travels through the air. This vortex optimizes the seed’s ability to germinate because it allows the stem and seed to remain intact longer. This flower has adapted to its conditions and learned how to thrive. No wonder these things pop up everywhere!

The winds of uncertainty are gusting. Our seeds have been and will continue to be dislodged. We could all use some pappus in our lives right now.

One of the nastiest qualities of uncertainty is its ability to seep into every aspect of life. We’re creatures of habit. When one cog in the system wavers it trickles down making the whole thing go haywire.

Uncertainty bewitches our self-belief into inadequacy. Uncertainty’s incantation is “there was a better way and you are to blame”. The spell of uncertainty immobilizes us until we fall back on unhealthy, avoidant, stress-inducing thought patterns and behaviors.

It’s useful to pay attention to how the precariousness of this situation impacts our individual lives. Our individual actions are more paramount than ever. But, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, controlling the controllables is not an excuse to beat the shit out of yourself.

Fluid situations breed unsatisfying answers. Give yourself credit, especially if you feel like you haven’t handled it well. These situations can be so demoralizing because it’s impossible to feel like you’ve done a “good job”, whatever that means. Get rid of the expectation that you should be able to handle this well. What does that even mean? You are already handling it. I’m handling it. We’re are going to continue to handle it. Like I said in my last post, necessity forces capability. Trust that.

Our pappus in these situations is our ability to generate perspective. Have you ever seen ESPN’s 30 for 30 documentary series? If not, the series covers 30 seemingly unbelievable stories from the sports world. Each episode starts out with a narrator saying “what if I told you…” and then explaining exactly what happened in a way that evokes more understanding and compassion.

What if I told you that on top of life’s regular rigors, you’d have to navigate a global pandemic?

What if I told you that it’s okay to be scared and stressed out beyond belief?

What if I told you that everyone else is probably feeling the exact same way?

Fill in the question with whatever is actually happening in your life. Go wild with it!

Posing this question makes the slack in any situation more apparent. It creates an understanding of how hard life can be sometimes. Which brings with it a sense of forgiveness. It relaxes the expectation of always being able to handle everything well.

Like the pappus of the dandelion seed, asking “what if I told you” generates a self-protective vortex of understanding. It allows us to slow down our descent from life as we knew it and land ready to blossom in our new circumstances.